Petition to the Lettuce Editor in Chief:
It has come to my attention that you are using Times New Roman as your font in your newspaper. A fine choice, of course, as long as your intention is to RUIN your paper before it even reaches circulation. Honestly, you’d think that someone who was named “Editor in Chief” of a paper would know how to, I don’t know, EDIT A PAPER. It’s as if you need everything spelled out to you: C-H-A-N-G-E your font or you will soon be replaced by someone more capable and understanding. Someone who has true vision and knows what good aesthetics are. Someone who writes using the most engaging and elaborate font: Comic Sans. Someone much like myself.
Watch your back,
S.H. (12th grade)